Joke thread

2399 · **Posted:** Sun Feb 19, 2012 3:10 pm

Andy Waller wrote:

I went to the zoo and all there was, was a little dog sat there.

It was a shit zoo.

I didn't get it....

This is how it's done:

communistworkethic wrote:

bloke goes to the zoo, there was only a dog there

it was a shit-zu

From Wed Nov 09, 2005 3:17 pm!!!

Let's combine the two to make a super joke!
I went to the zoo and all there was, was a little dog sat there.

it was a shit-zu

TANGODANCER · **Posted:** Sun Feb 19, 2012 4:01 pm

2399 wrote:

Andy Waller wrote:

I went to the zoo and all there was, was a little dog sat there.

It was a shit zoo.

I didn't get it....

This is how it's done:

communistworkethic wrote:

bloke goes to the zoo, there was only a dog there

it was a shit-zu

From Wed Nov 09, 2005 3:17 pm!!!

Let's combine the two to make a super joke!
I went to the zoo and all there was, was a little dog sat there.

it was a shit-zu

davroduk · **Posted:** Sun Feb 19, 2012 10:35 pm

Dujon wrote:

A young mother was taking her four years old daughter for her daily walk when the daughter stopped to watch some ants running up and down a plant. "What are those ants doing, Mummy?", she asked. The mother explained that the ants were probably milking the aphids that lived on the bush and then described what was going on. "Gosh you're clever, Mummy," she paused for a moment and added "are all mummies as clever as you?" "Yes, darling, all mummies are clever as they have to pass a Mum Test before they are allowed to become mothers."

The pair ambled on, the youngster deep in thought. Suddenly she piped up, her face problem free, "Oh, I get it! Those who don't pass the Mum Test have to become daddies."

2399 · **Posted:** Mon Feb 20, 2012 4:59 am

It's a Joke for Mothers and Women Basically.

My Partner laughed at it

2399 · **Posted:** Mon Feb 20, 2012 1:29 pm

I told some jokes to a friend today (from the first 5 pages here/.)

He told a very Crude one.

I said I should post it here and both he and my Partner said 'No Way!' and that I would get death threats and even banned if I were to post it.

So I'll Post a riddle:

What's In the Past, In Today, at the end of every Era; But not in the Future????????????????

Wait until next week to Find out!!!!

_____________________
This is my new Signature

Nah ; It is the Letter A

malcd1 · **Posted:** Mon Feb 20, 2012 1:31 pm

That was an easy one.

I thought you were barred from this forum anyway? :wink:

thebish · **Posted:** Tue Feb 21, 2012 6:50 pm

Gooner Girl · **Posted:** Tue Feb 21, 2012 7:53 pm

malcd1 wrote:

That was an easy one.

I thought you were barred from this forum anyway? :wink:

he should be purely for that new signature!

2399 · **Posted:** Tue Feb 21, 2012 11:52 pm

The Signature I posted was fake.

(So I could add a few seconds extra to the riddle)

Montreal Wanderer · **Posted:** Wed Feb 22, 2012 6:15 pm

2399 wrote:

The Signature I posted was fake.

(So I could add a few seconds extra to the riddle)

It didn't require that many.

Montreal Wanderer · **Posted:** Wed Feb 22, 2012 6:15 pm

There comes a time when a woman just has to trust her husband. For example...

A wife comes home late at night and quietly opens the door to her bedroom.
From under the blanket she sees four legs instead of two.
She reaches for a baseball bat and starts hitting the blanket as hard as she can.
Once she's done, she goes to the Blackburn to have a drink.

As she enters, she sees her husband there, reading a magazine.

Hi Darling", he says, "Your parents have come to visit us, so l let them stay in our bedroom. Did you say hello?

Prufrock · **Posted:** Thu Feb 23, 2012 2:21 am

Just walked in on my illiterate brother sobbing about how difficult his English exam is going to be. I gave him a big hug and said, "There, their they're."

He'll never know the difference.

TANGODANCER · **Posted:** Thu Feb 23, 2012 12:13 pm

Worth repeating a classic in memory of Frank Carson:

"Did you hear about the Irishman who reversed into a car-boot sale and sold the engine."

thebish · **Posted:** Thu Feb 23, 2012 12:56 pm

TANGODANCER wrote:

Worth repeating a classic in memory of Frank Carson:

"Did you hear about the Irishman who reversed into a car-boot sale and sold the engine."

lolz... that'd be because all Irishmen are thick, right??

Worthy4England · **Posted:** Thu Feb 23, 2012 1:05 pm

thebish wrote:

TANGODANCER wrote:

Worth repeating a classic in memory of Frank Carson:

"Did you hear about the Irishman who reversed into a car-boot sale and sold the engine."

lolz... that'd be because all Irishmen are thick, right??

Depends - sometimes it's just Kerrymen...

Andy Waller · **Posted:** Thu Feb 23, 2012 1:10 pm

thebish wrote:

TANGODANCER wrote:

Worth repeating a classic in memory of Frank Carson:

"Did you hear about the Irishman who reversed into a car-boot sale and sold the engine."

lolz... that'd be because all Irishmen are thick, right??

Nah, he had a Porsche.

Gary the Enfield · **Posted:** Thu Feb 23, 2012 1:13 pm

thebish wrote:

TANGODANCER wrote:

Worth repeating a classic in memory of Frank Carson:

"Did you hear about the Irishman who reversed into a car-boot sale and sold the engine."

lolz... that'd be because all Irishmen are thick, right??

Tick

TANGODANCER · **Posted:** Thu Feb 23, 2012 1:30 pm

thebish wrote:

TANGODANCER wrote:

Worth repeating a classic in memory of Frank Carson:

"Did you hear about the Irishman who reversed into a car-boot sale and sold the engine."

lolz... that'd be because all Irishmen are thick, right??

No, just because Frank Carson was an Irishman with a sense of humour. My dad was also one.

thebish · **Posted:** Thu Feb 23, 2012 1:32 pm

TANGODANCER wrote:

thebish wrote:

TANGODANCER wrote:

Worth repeating a classic in memory of Frank Carson:

"Did you hear about the Irishman who reversed into a car-boot sale and sold the engine."

lolz... that'd be because all Irishmen are thick, right??

No, just because Frank Carson was an Irishman with a sense of humour. My dad was also one.

... not just that though - cos you'd also have to be thick to sell your engine... surely? the joke IS that Irishmen are thick isn't it? :conf:

boltonboris · **Posted:** Thu Feb 23, 2012 1:32 pm

thebish wrote:

TANGODANCER wrote:

Worth repeating a classic in memory of Frank Carson:

"Did you hear about the Irishman who reversed into a car-boot sale and sold the engine."

lolz... that'd be because all Irishmen are thick, right??

You can be a right tosser at times

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