Holy Matrimony - pfft

General Mannerheim · **Posted:** Mon Jun 10, 2013 10:21 am

Mrs has been on my case about a wedding lately. We’ve been ‘engaged’ for donkeys, ive never really been a subscriber to the concept of marriage per say but im not adverse to it either and have always maintained that if she ever wanted to go ahead then I’d be happy to turn up; but neither of us have ever been enamoured with the idea of an actual wedding; the organising, the cost, the thought of being the centre of attention all day, the dread that no frigger will turn up etc. However, were both getting older, we have a 3yr old and one on the way and were beginning to accept it'd be right thing to do, albeit for possibly the wrong reasons...

The thing now is how, who, what, where and how big? The best weddings ive been to have been pretty intimate affairs abroad, but as much as i enjoyed them in the end i always resented being invited to them initially, being ‘invited’ to spend a packet and take time off work, to celebrate their special day? plus It also isolates those who would love to come but possibly can’t afford it. Then again ive never been to a bad one either, they are always great days! i dunno, and im giving it more thought than i ever wanted to – so ideas people – where are the nicest places you’ve attended weddings lately??

General Mannerheim · **Posted:** Mon Jun 10, 2013 10:23 am

former poster HRG appears to have just had the daddy of all weddings btw - Vegas/NYC/Florida, that'd do it for me!

thebish · **Posted:** Mon Jun 10, 2013 10:44 am

General Mannerheim wrote:

Mrs has been on my case about a wedding lately. We’ve been ‘engaged’ for donkeys, ive never really been a subscriber to the concept of marriage per say but im not adverse to it either and have always maintained that if she ever wanted to go ahead then I’d be happy to turn up; but neither of us have ever been enamoured with the idea of an actual wedding; the organising, the cost, the thought of being the centre of attention all day, the dread that no frigger will turn up etc.

it really doesn't need to cost that much to get married - and you don't need to invite loads of people. If you really don't want loads of organising, a huge cost or to be the centre of attention - but you simply want to be married - then go see the registrar - get married and afterwards go for a quite meal with those you love the most - there's no law that there has to be:

huge reception for hundreds of people
cake
fancy clothes
cars
honeymoon
expensive photographer
bridesmaids
sugared fecking almonds

it's only as expensive as you decide to make it...

Lord Kangana · **Posted:** Mon Jun 10, 2013 10:54 am

Yeah, my mates did that. 10 of us in total I think. Registry office, really nice little restaurant. Best Man's speech was easy to 9 other people. It doesn't seem to have harmed them, they're still married 12 years later.

And the real upside, for me, was her dad paid for some top notch wine and fizz at the meal. Normally at weddings you just get shite because you're paying so much and its for a billion people.

General Mannerheim · **Posted:** Mon Jun 10, 2013 10:55 am

i do like the sound of that, although it would be difficult to get away with if done locally. it could upset a few people - how do you know where to stop with 'those you love the most'? ive mates i care more about than half my family.

id definitely not be inviting step-uncles or twice removed cousins just becasue im expected to, or any cousins tbh, just becasue we share the same bloodline somewhere... and another one is having to invite people on the back of them inviting you to theirs!?

the bride is alright, she's an only child, & her parents were both only childs so happy days on the cousin front. there is a bitter divorce tho that she is very worried about, but were all adults ffs, shouldnt even be a concern.

thebish · **Posted:** Mon Jun 10, 2013 11:01 am

General Mannerheim wrote:

i do like the sound of that, although it would be difficult to get away with if done locally. it could upset a few people, also how do you know where to stop with 'those you love the most'?

id definitely not be inviting step-uncles or twice removed cousins just becasue im expected to, or any cousins tbh, just becasue we share the same bloodline somewhere... and another one is having to invite people on the back of them inviting you to theirs!?

i have conducted hundreds of weddings... the one that still stands out in my mind as the most joyful was one where there were just 8 people present - the couple - their 2 kids and four best friends (who acted as witnesses) ... (I think parents might have been dead)

it was joyful because...

they just loved each other and actually WANTED to be married
they were not spending the day stressing about other people and whether THEY were happy
they were totally relaxed

they got married in the church - it was a midweek daytime - and then went to a restaurant over the road. there was no stupid huge dress or any of that malarkey - they just dressed a bit smarter than normal - maybe as if they were going to someone else's wedding... they came down the aisle to D-Ream "Things can only get better" (before Blair tainted it!) with their kids dancing about and carrying helium balloons...

in my experience - the bigger they get - the more stressed and anxious people are - and they are more and more miserable...

Lord Kangana · **Posted:** Mon Jun 10, 2013 11:09 am

Yeah, I see loads of bridezillas who just spend the day in a foul (fowl?) mood.

boltonboris · **Posted:** Mon Jun 10, 2013 12:27 pm

Best day of my life... And not some soppy loved up way. I got pissed up, had a mint meal, drank some absolutely belting wine (Robert Mundavi) all of it with my mates.

Stag do before it, honeymoon after it. What's not to like?

The speech bit was a shitter leading up to it, but was a proper adreline rush and I actually nailed it too..

Regardless of the expense, if she wanted to, I'd do it again tomorrow.

Abdoulaye's Twin · **Posted:** Mon Jun 10, 2013 1:34 pm

I did the abroad thing. Largely because I hate the centre of attention thing as well. I rented 4 villas, each with pools, next to each other. Split the cost between the family and friends that came and I too the hit on a couple of unused bedrooms. Did a registry office ceremony and then BBQ and piss-up at one of the villas. We had the wedding on a Monday, so folk could do just a long weekend or a week.

It worked for us. We had a few people helping with putting the food together. Had a playlist on the iPod and everyone just got changed into shorts and t-shirts and partied. Was a really great day and didn't cost an arm and a leg.

Gooner Girl · **Posted:** Mon Jun 10, 2013 1:36 pm

Have you checked that the missus doesn't have it all planned out down to the last T already? Us women usually have a good idea of how they want these things to be

P.S I named all the tables after Arsenal players rather then number them. Far cooler...

Abdoulaye's Twin · **Posted:** Mon Jun 10, 2013 1:41 pm

Gooner Girl wrote:

Have you checked that the missus doesn't have it all planned out down to the last T already? Us women usually have a good idea of how they want these things to be

P.S I named all the tables after Arsenal players rather then number them. Far cooler...

And if you were on the Cygan table you knew you were invited out of obligation!

Lost Leopard Spot · **Posted:** Mon Jun 10, 2013 1:44 pm

Abdoulaye's Twin wrote:

Gooner Girl wrote:

Have you checked that the missus doesn't have it all planned out down to the last T already? Us women usually have a good idea of how they want these things to be

P.S I named all the tables after Arsenal players rather then number them. Far cooler...

And if you were on the Cygan table you knew you were invited out of obligation!

And the Van Persie table was for people thinking about moving up north to Manchester.

Gooner Girl · **Posted:** Mon Jun 10, 2013 1:48 pm

Lost Leopard Spot wrote:

Abdoulaye's Twin wrote:

Gooner Girl wrote:

Have you checked that the missus doesn't have it all planned out down to the last T already? Us women usually have a good idea of how they want these things to be

P.S I named all the tables after Arsenal players rather then number them. Far cooler...

And if you were on the Cygan table you knew you were invited out of obligation!

And the Van Persie table was for people thinking about moving up north to Manchester.

This was before Cygan and RVPs time so nerr.

Montreal Wanderer · **Posted:** Mon Jun 10, 2013 7:01 pm

I have been married in various ways. Most recently, I was married at my older son's house. The service was performed by my wife's schoolfriend (also my former secretary). There present were my four children and four others for a total of 11. We bought some really nice steaks, which my son BBQed, and my older daughter made a really nice cake. It was great. I also enjoyed the first marriage - Bolton Registry Office, with only my parents, an Aunt and a friend present, followed by a dinner at the Yew Tree (I wonder if that still exists). That was nice too. The bigger wedding with many guests (most of whom I neither knew now really wanted to) was stressful, the meal rubber chicken and the alcohol inferior. Go for the small quiet one is my advice.

Burnden Paddock · **Posted:** Mon Jun 10, 2013 9:29 pm

Montreal Wanderer wrote:

I have been married in various ways. Most recently, I was married at my older son's house. The service was performed by my wife's schoolfriend (also my former secretary). There present were my four children and four others for a total of 11. We bought some really nice steaks, which my son BBQed, and my older daughter made a really nice cake. It was great. I also enjoyed the first marriage - Bolton Registry Office, with only my parents, an Aunt and a friend present, followed by a dinner at the Yew Tree (I wonder if that still exists). That was nice too. The bigger wedding with many guests (most of whom I neither knew now really wanted to) was stressful, the meal rubber chicken and the alcohol inferior. Go for the small quiet one is my advice.

Mine was at the Registry Office. We just wanted to get married with as little fuss as possible and certainly didn't want to spend thousands in the process. The Registry Office was in Paderborn House at the time, 19 years ago. It's now located at Merehall, if you weren't aware. Where was it when you were married?

Harry Genshaw · **Posted:** Mon Jun 10, 2013 10:33 pm

Gooner Girl wrote:

Lost Leopard Spot wrote:

Abdoulaye's Twin wrote:

Gooner Girl wrote:

Have you checked that the missus doesn't have it all planned out down to the last T already? Us women usually have a good idea of how they want these things to be

P.S I named all the tables after Arsenal players rather then number them. Far cooler...

And if you were on the Cygan table you knew you were invited out of obligation!

And the Van Persie table was for people thinking about moving up north to Manchester.

This was before Cygan and RVPs time so nerr.

Was the Tony Adams table legless?

bobo the clown · **Posted:** Mon Jun 10, 2013 10:40 pm

Montreal Wanderer wrote:

followed by a dinner at the Yew Tree (I wonder if that still exists).

As in the Yew Tree in Adlington/Rivington ?

If so, yes ... it most certainly does. Still a fine establishment.

http://www.yewtreeinnchorley.com/

If it's another one .... it depends.

Prufrock · **Posted:** Mon Jun 10, 2013 11:03 pm

The Yew Tree up Rivington way changed hands fairly recently (about six months ago). Before, it had a really good reputation, though I didn't think it was all that. The new folks didn't have a clue, were still charging the previous mid to top-range prices, and churning out shit. I *think* it may have changed again, but don't know if it's any good. The family who had the Yew Tree now have the Cherry Tree down on the A6 before the turn up that steep hill towards Blackrod (can't remember the street name, something like Dark Lane). The Cherry Tree, imo, is the bomb, much, much better than the Yew Tree ever was, and is highly recommended if you're ever that way.

Gooner Girl · **Posted:** Mon Jun 10, 2013 11:17 pm

Harry Genshaw wrote:

Gooner Girl wrote:

Lost Leopard Spot wrote:

Abdoulaye's Twin wrote:

Gooner Girl wrote:

Have you checked that the missus doesn't have it all planned out down to the last T already? Us women usually have a good idea of how they want these things to be

P.S I named all the tables after Arsenal players rather then number them. Far cooler...

And if you were on the Cygan table you knew you were invited out of obligation!

And the Van Persie table was for people thinking about moving up north to Manchester.

This was before Cygan and RVPs time so nerr.

Was the Tony Adams table legless?

No but my uncle cut out some ears and made a donkey out of the Tony Adams sign

Montreal Wanderer · **Posted:** Mon Jun 10, 2013 11:40 pm

Burnden Paddock wrote:

Montreal Wanderer wrote:

I have been married in various ways. Most recently, I was married at my older son's house. The service was performed by my wife's schoolfriend (also my former secretary). There present were my four children and four others for a total of 11. We bought some really nice steaks, which my son BBQed, and my older daughter made a really nice cake. It was great. I also enjoyed the first marriage - Bolton Registry Office, with only my parents, an Aunt and a friend present, followed by a dinner at the Yew Tree (I wonder if that still exists). That was nice too. The bigger wedding with many guests (most of whom I neither knew now really wanted to) was stressful, the meal rubber chicken and the alcohol inferior. Go for the small quiet one is my advice.

Mine was at the Registry Office. We just wanted to get married with as little fuss as possible and certainly didn't want to spend thousands in the process. The Registry Office was in Paderborn House at the time, 19 years ago. It's now located at Merehall, if you weren't aware. Where was it when you were married?

It was on Knowsley Street between Deansgate and the Town Hall. I just had a look at google maps and it doesn't seem to exist as a street any more - some kind of unnamed pedestrian thoroughfare. It was on the left as you walked south towards the Town Hall and up two or three flights. Pretty small place and it said it was the District of Farnworth Registry Office which I always thought odd. Paderborn House and Merehall sound much grander though I've never heard of them.

Holy Matrimony - pfft

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